So I had this incredibly awkward moment at a coffee shop. It felt more than awkward, it felt a little creepy.
I had a random guy ask to hold my baby today. When I told him no, he proceeded to tell him that his son is a friendly adult, because they passed him around as a baby. Oh my goodness. Let’s set aside the discussion of what is best in attachment and bonding for a minute. All I could think was, “I don’t know you from Adam. You think I am going to let you hold my precious baby?” I’ve had things like elderly women reaching into my Moby wrap to touch my baby or overly friendly adults reach out and touch my girls’ hair without asking. But this one set me over the edge.
Stranger-danger?
Slightly creepy? Ok, really creepy.
I love our community. I love meeting new people. But I am a Momma Bear when it comes to my kids and my own personal space. Help a girl out, dear readers!! How do you respond to strangers that are a little too touchy or interactive with your children? Does it not bother you? Does it make you squirm? Are you firm? What words do you say?
**************************
Wow, that is super creepy! Don’t feel bad for saying no. Generally I would probably make something up about my baby being sick or tired. But in this case I would kindly tell the guy that handing your baby over to a stranger is not how you parent and walk away!
It depends on the age. Babies, I wasn’t a fan of strangers touching them unless it was their feet – I know some cultures around this area are more ‘touchy-feely’ than my own. Now, though, my children are 3 & 5 and the whole ‘stranger danger’ idea is a big one. They’re both terribly shy, almost painfully so, and so when someone talks to them they almost always ignore them.
My 9 month old daughter was in her stroller at a store and a lady commented on how cute she was and walked away. 30 seconds later she came back and asked to hold her. To say I was creeped out would be an understatement! I quickly said my daughter was happy in her stroller and basically ran the opposite direction!! I hate when people reach in the stroller to touch her face or hands. I don’t know where their hands have been and what germs they just put on my daughters hands that she’s going to transfer to her mouth. I’m with you on being a momma bear when it comes to strangers and your baby!!
Whoa, this is really strange (the guy’s behavior). I agree with Kara – I would be firm and kind and not feel bad at ALL about coming off as rude. Stick to your instinct. I also think that everybody’s tolerance for different kinds of social interactions is different – I’m really protective/sensitive in some areas and not others. It’s good for our kids to see us staying true to ourselves – whatever that looks like to you. With older kids, too, there is good opportunity for dialogue later about not just the usual stranger danger stuff, but about what to do in uncomfortable situations. Looking forward to hearing from others – great post! 🙂
Eeeewww…Definitely go with your gut. I try to laugh like I didn’t understand what they were asking – “yes I do love to hold my baby!” and then move on, quickly!
Yup, super weird! And the fact that he tried to guilt you into it by telling you that he would grow up to be a friendly adult? Not cool, not cool at all. Mama Bears Unite!
Comments are closed.