Even though I was lonely after my divorce, I knew that I wouldn’t be ready to date until I took the time to let my broken heart heal. People would bring up online dating, and I would brush it off. Instead, I made plans with friends, pursued my interests, and spent time keeping my family of two happy and healthy.
Not too long ago, I moved into a new house. As I was unpacking, I realized that for the first time since my ex moved out, I felt at home, and completely at peace with my life. It was a wonderful feeling to realize that my life finally felt like my own.
I decided that I was ready to dip my toe in the pool of online dating. I haven’t dated since high school (which is what happens when you marry young, I suppose), so first I googled articles on all the dating websites available. After finding a recent article that laid out the pros and cons of various sites, I decided to join an app based site that catered to a slightly older demographic (I’m not in my 20s anymore, and I’m ok with that). I put up a profile, and waited to see what would happen.
As luck would have it, I started chatting with a few men that were also divorced. I went on a few dates, and then found a guy that I really clicked with. We got to know each other through text, phone calls, and a few dates, when we could find time. It was going great, until it wasn’t. I received a text one morning that he didn’t feel the “spark” he was looking for, and he didn’t want to lead me on. Just like that it was over.
I was surprised how disappointed I was. It had seemed like we had a lot in common, and wanted the same things out of life. Then I realized that it was a great experience to have. I found someone that made me smile, enjoyed making a connection with another person, and had some fun. I reclaimed a piece of the woman I was before I became “Mommy”, and I’ve figured out a little bit more about what I want in a relationship.
So despite the fact that this is a story about the end of a potential relationship, I’m choosing to see it as the beginning; another page in this chapter of my life. I was worried that online dating was going to be hard as a single mom. It turns out that it might be the perfect way for a busy mom to meet new people, and weed out the duds before committing too much time.