On Being a Mom for a Year

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Melissa Young Photo 

First off, where’s my reward?

Juusstt kidding! Its really my hubby who deserves a reward for handeling me with love and grace in those first few months of no sleep!

But really, it is absolutely insane to me that my baby boy is now one. A whole year old. I feel like I blinked and it happened. Wasn’t I just anxiously waiting for his arrival? Waiting to see what he would look like? {Oh yeah, and eating my placenta?}

And now, he’s here..crawling..eating..saying a few words. It’s all just nuts.

I feel like this year has obviously been amazing learning how to be a mother {and getting the privilege to do so} but it has also been amazing in learning about myself more. I feel like so many thoughts of myself and who I am, have changed so much this year.

I used to think I was a fairly selfless and patient person, and then I had a baby.

I used to think I functioned fairly well under any circumstance, and then I had a newborn.

I used to think I would always keep my cool and never have ‘that screaming baby in the grocery store’, and then I had a baby.

Being a mom has stretched me, strengthened me, and most importantly it has blessed me. I tried my absolute hardest to really listen when people told me that ‘time flies’, that he will grow up way too fast. To soak it all in, because they change daily. But I now see that no matter how many people tell you things like that, you have to experience it to believe it. 

If I could give any new mamas-to-be some advice {that they probably won’t grasp until they are going through it as well!} it would be this:

  • You will find what works best for you, and for your baby – I promise. People are going to tell you how they ‘got their baby to sleep’, or ‘the right age to start solids’, or even ‘how to lose the baby weight’. But YOU and YOUR baby will figure it out, and whatever you chose will be the right one.
  • Be patient with yourself {and others around you 😉 }. Babies don’t come with an instruction manual. You are figuring it out one day at a time, and that, my friend, is never going to change no matter how old your ‘baby’ gets. Its all a learning process.
  • Finally, try and enjoy it and soak it in. I know, I know, this is something I was told and didn’t even come close to grasping it till it was almost too late. But still, try. It goes fast. Each stage is over before you know it. Love that current stage.

What would be the main thing you tell a new mama? Words of wisdom? Or to simply have a girls night out? Bottle of wine and paper plates? Do tell!

2 COMMENTS

  1. Thank you! Excellent advice as always!
    For a friend’s recent baby shower we were all asked to give our own maternal advice. This is what I came up with, not as helpful as the above info, but it was enjoyed anyway, so I thought I’d share it with y’all too:

    1) Marvel at how you just made the most beautiful thing on earth. Compare to other crappier stuff you’ve made in past (gluten free bread, ashtrays, one legged Christmas ornaments)

    2) Don’t feel bad if you don’t purée your own organically grown vegetables. Your mother didn’t and you are perfect

    3) Baby rats fed only a few drops of their mother’s breast milk are immune to horrible diseases. Congratulate yourself on any breast feeding you do- not just if you make the 12 month mark.

    4) When your annoying Dostoevsky-loving neighbour asks how many novels you’ve read recently, include anything written by Sarah Boynton. Be vague about the titles.

    5) Take monthly photos of your baby.

    6) And then take photos of the first smile/bath/ poo/ tooth/ hair cut etc so you don’t have large expanses of emptiness in the baby book you were gonna fill in diligently.

    7) You’re probably gonna cry a lot so just go with it. Exhausted tears, ecstatic tears, overwhelmed tears, I-don’t-know-why-I’m-crying tears and immensely grateful tears.

    8) Thank your own mother at every opportunity. Be slightly amazed at how she didn’t complain more about your own general existence.

    9) Laugh at how you were worried you might not love your baby as much as your dog

    10) Ask cardiologist friends whether your heart can literally get bigger from overwhelming amounts of love. Pretend you were joking when they look at you weirdly.

  2. My first baby just graduated from college. My second baby will graduate high school in 2 weeks. I’m amazed by how blessed I’ve been by being their mom.

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