Archives Week! My Favorite Post of Jenn’s

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It’s Archives Week here at SMB, and this morning I’m featuring my favorite post of Jenn’s. You can read all her posts here.

Even though I consider myself a Stay-at-Home-Mom, in reading this post I realized that I “Work at Home” as much as I  “Stay at Home”. It occurred to me that manage the business end of Scottsdale Moms Blog, throw some fun Mom’s Night Out Arizona events and help my husband with our business. Oh, I guess that’s “work”. So, reading through Jenn’s mom’s words of wisdom helped me to remember why we’ve made the decisions we have and to think through where I want to be when my little ones leave the house. This is such an encouragement to moms no matter which path you choose! ~ Joy

Definition of multi-task:  the concurrent performance of several jobs by one person; the performance of multiple tasks at one time.

If you would like to learn how to be a pro at multitasking, have a baby and go back to work!

Like many working moms, I carry around the guilt about spending precious hours in the day working, instead of doing art projects and play dates.

Instead of playing “tea parties” and dress-up, I work. I count on my husband to take on key parenting duties mutually with me and “let someone else raise my children” when I work.

If you ask a working mom how she’s doing you probably will be lied to. We’ll say “I’m doing great”, but the response in our head is more like this:

“I’m busier than I have ever been in my entire life. I wake up to spend a precious hour with my child, gulp multiple cups of coffee while thinking about work. The nanny comes, I scurry to send some work emails out, pay a bill, and power through a chaotic day, worry about what’s for dinner, brush miniature teeth and bribe a child to take a bath, send more work emails out and crash into my pillow thinking about work and feeling guilty that I am not spending enough time with my daughter.”

Like a lot of working moms, there are days or weeks when I feel guilty and completely overwhelmed. I worry about the decisions I made, but also knowing the path I chose was the right one for my family.

As this Mother’s Day approached I started to think about how my mom (who also was a working mom) handled the guilt, stress and struggles of “doing it all”.  She must have done something right; after all, I never felt inadequate as a child with a working mom, or never felt less fortunate to have a working mom. Actually quite the contrary – I felt proud to have such a strong working mom and always strived to be like her in some ways.

I recently sat down with my mom to get some advice on raising children while being a working mom and I wanted to share them with you:

What is the best parenting advice to give to working moms?

Prioritize your time and when you are home forget work and enjoy your family!

What’s the one thing you would have done differently as a working mom?

Not to bring all my work problems home and listen more to the children and their issues.

Why did you choose to go back to work?

To build a career and to see if I could achieve my goals I wanted for myself and family. To try to “do it all”!

Do you think it is easier or harder to be a working mom now?

I think it is easier now with more tools for healthy carry-out food, mom support groups, and more modern spouses helping out.

What words come to mind when you think back on being a working mom?

Family first. Careers second.

How did you manage the busy schedule that included wife, mom, and entrepreneur?

I had a great spouse to help out  and also a good listener to vent to. But I honestly don’t know how I survived it all! I look back and sometimes think, “How did I do it”?  There were nights I even said some prayers to help me with reading books at bedtime, when all I wanted to do was collapse on my bed!

Any relationship tips you can offer to other working moms?

Date nights at least once a week, even if this means sneaking on patio for a glass of wine when kids go to bed!

What is the one guilt you have being a working mom?

I bought a lot of material gifts for you guys, like toys, clothes and games. I look back and think I “over-gifted” because I was trying to curb my guilt. If I were to do it over again, I now see the value of a simple hug, reading a book or just spending time together.

What values or advice do you have as a working mom? Do you have any regrets choosing to go back to work?

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