Okay, mamas, let’s talk pediatricians.
I have a dilemma. I’ve been with the same doctor at the same pediatrics practice since my 3.5 year old was born. I now have a 15-month-old as well. Between well checks, chronic ear infections with my little one, and just your average amount of bugs, fevers, rashes, etc. requiring a professional’s opinion, we’ve put in our fair share of patronage at this place.
The problem is, our doctor never seems to have the foggiest idea who we are. More than once the doctor has referred to my son as a “she” in the first few moments of conversation. There was one stretch of time last winter in which my little one had two ear infections, a bout with excema and a well-check and we ended up in the office five times in four weeks, and the pediatrician STILL didn’t show any sign of recognition.
I get that doctors see a lot of patients. I don’t expect our doctor to remember my kids’ favorite colors or my first name or even all the details of our visits. I don’t expect to get the doc’s personal cell phone number or get a follow-up call at home after a visit. I am actually a very low-maintenance patient/parent (I think). I respect the doctors’ time and the fact that they see a ton of kids. You would think, though, that a simple glance at the chart before walking into the exam room would jog a good physician’s memory that, hey, this family was just here last week for an ear infection, maybe I’ll ask how that cleared up. Or that eventually, after two kids and DOZENS of office visits, there would a little flicker of recognition in the doctor’s face upon entering the room.
So here’s my question: am I over-reacting? Do your doctors give you the same blank look? Do you feel like your family is just a number on an insurance card, or do you have some level of relationship beyond that? Are any of you medical professionals who could offer insight into the other side of this situation?
NOTE: I don’t really want this to turn into a pediatrician bashing/endorsing session. I’ve left our practice’s name and even our doctor’s gender out of this on purpose. Our doctor is a great doctor and I like the practice. I’m just trying to get a feel for whether my experience is unique and whether or not I’m out to lunch on expecting a little more. (And if you feel strongly about recommending or discussing a specific practice, I’d love to have you email me at [email protected]. I want to support our local docs and don’t want to throw anybody under the bus. 🙂 )
Our ped remembers me, my kids, asks about my husband job.
Thanks, Heather! My gut tells me I’m not totally crazy here… 🙂 Appreciate the feedback!
I absolutely love our Pediatrician~ actually, the whole practice. Camelback Pediatrics. I have seen probably every doctor in the practice, and they all seem to remember us. When the receptionist asks who we want to see to make an appointment, I rarely specify because all of them are so great. I feel like if you are not happy with the “bedside manor” of your DR, it might be time to find a new one.
Thanks, Mariana. I will keep that in mind. It is nice to be in a practice where you like and trust all the doctors, and I will say that I feel that way about ours. One of the reasons I’ve stayed is that I like all the docs, like the practice, and DO feel like our doc is a good doctor. I just keep waiting for the day when I won’t feel like it’s our first visit and the doc is meeting us for the first time. 🙂
The ped we had in town there always remembered our kids by name and remembered conversations we had previously had. Also would spend time visiting with us before and after any exam just to get to know us better. VERY personable. But I searched and searched for a small practice.
Thanks Jess. I’m guessing your practice wasn’t in my neck of the woods, though, huh? 😉 Hope you’ve found a good one up there, too!
It was in Chandler
Oh I’m so sorry! Feeling ‘forgotten’ is awful, especially when you’re trying to care for your child(ren).
As for my experience, I’m actually one of those moms that will see whatever Doctor is available when I want to go in. Fortunately for me, they always seem to remember us. Not sure if it is because we’re like a zoo (my kids: 3 yrs, 18 months & 2 weeks). I do know that even if a Doctor is qualified doesn’t mean their ‘bedside manner’ is good. I would ask around and try another practice or Doctor. You want to feel comfortable that you and your child(ren) are getting the best care.
Best of luck! I know you’ll find the right place. There are so many amazing pediatricians in Phoenix/Scottsdale. 🙂
Kari, thank you – that’s interesting because I too never mind when we have to see someone else in the practice and, in fact, sometimes have felt like the other docs in this practice actually recognize us, even if we’ve seen them much less frequently. So I don’t mind seeing different docs either – although I do try to do our well checks with the same doc just for some kind of continuity of care, which is why it is a bummer not to feel like there’s any recollection of who we are! Thank you for your kind words. 🙂
We have experienced once with our Dr same thing you have mentioned and actually the dr bashed us for a previous remark he has brought up in a discussion we had related to a surgery my child had to go through in the future , he not only did not remember the previous discussion but looked at us like we were just thrown from some car in the middle of nowhere not knowing where to go, we felt so bad in that instance that wanted to utter few words of “blessings upon his head ” … I think in big practices like ours the drs are proned to not remember you for the next visit , but urs did not have any excuse whatsoever 🙂
Ours remembers Parker every time. He always asks how our jobs are going and always specifically asks how we are handling being parents. He really makes sure we are comfortable with decisions and wants to know if we are experiencing stress from our jobs or parenting in general. He is super gentle with Parker and I even if Parker is wild the entire time we are there, he becomes fixated on this doctor and immediately calms down once he enters the room. It is such a great feeling to know that my (almost 1 year old-one tomorrow, actually) is so comforted by his presence. He came as a recommendation and I found out I know a few other moms that see him as well. His name is Dr. Sotelo at Papago Butte Ped.
We see the same Dr. as MeganM, and she said it perfect. He always inquires about the whole family and I love how he has you come to his office after well checks to guide and answer questions. So patient and you never feel rushed. My husband always comments on how calming he is!
He is near the 101 and Via de Ventura in Scottsdale, if that makes a difference location wise.
I am slightly obsessed with our pediatrician and highly recommend him. He asks about Keith by name and remembers details about our lives. This is one reason that we fight to see specifically him every time we need to go to the office.
I take my kids to a pretty large practice, North Scottsdale Pediatrics. I’ve been seeing the same doctor since my first daughter was born (she’s 2 and a half), he remembers us very well and when I took my new baby (now 4 weeks) for her first appointment with him he apologized for being out of town when she was born and wasn’t able to come see her in the hospital. He was even able to recall some of my older daughter’s stats when she was a newborn and compared my new daughter to her when he did his assessment. Being a nurse I am really into bedside manner. I think a doctor should be able to recall an appointment from a week ago no matter how many patients they see! I would feel the same as you and I think of myself as a really low maintenance patient as well.
My kids are 4, 6, and 8 years now and we’ve been seeing the same doc since my oldest was born. He remembers us every time, including details about what my kids were like when they were young, their interests, our jobs, our family, and friends’ kids who are now grown who went through his practice years ago. Not sure if he just takes good notes or if he remembers all of this, but we LOVE our pediatrician! I also love that he talks to our kids, as well as to us, and lets them ask questions, even if they just want to know his favorite color. The other three docs in the practice are ok, but we keep going back just for him. Good luck with your decision!
Our Kiddie Doc always seems to remember us pretty well. But the Dr. I was always most impressed with all the details she remembered was my OB/GYN. Seriously, deets like my hubby’s job and things we had chatted about last visit. I was so impressed and had mentioned it to someone in the medical field and they said some Dr.s actually jot down some notes about the random things you discuss so that they can be more personable when you visit. Kinda like that! But good medical care is bottom line, so as long as they do that well ;).
All your insight is so helpful, ladies! Thank you! I know now that I’m not expecting something too crazy and that my kids and I aren’t totally forgettable. 🙂 I truly appreciate the comments!
I LOVE my ped’s office – though I’ve specifically asked to see the Nurse Practitioner for my daughter.(I love to have the consistency and I’m intentional to build that relationship now in case I need it in the future.) (I hated having a male Dr growing up (and I guess still do) so, I’d like her to have the same lady for the long-haul… i.e. puberty… yes, she’s two)
They (even the staff members) remember us. I remember one front desk clerk correcting another one for saying Reagan’s name wrong. He was like “how do you know that?” and she responded “she’s been coming since she was born” or something similar. (She was only one at the time)
Desert Ridge Children’s Center (right across Tatum from Desert Ridge)- LOVE them – actually picked them b/c the main Dr. was trained in alternative medicine, but practices as an MD. He takes each child’s circumstances into account and won’t just give “standard” answers/prescriptions. And, I’m happy to report that they JUST opened an office in South Scottsdale. There aren’t words for how thankful I am to be able to stay with them!
I use Camelback Pediatrics also, as another poster mentioned. I have to say, i LOVE them. They’re always friendly and seem happy to see us. And I’m sure they always remember who we are. Although I do have triplets, and I’ve been going there since my girls were born, so we’re probably more memorable than most, LOL. But my main doctor, and all the others we’ve seen over the years (my girls are 4 now) have all been great. Highly recommend them.
🙂
Our ped and all the other docs and all the nurses know us intimately. They have been part of our “team” in transition home our girls. You should feel comfortable and like they are on top of your child’s health, not an individual case/problem. 🙂
We absolutely love our pediatrician, Dr Lisa Engle, at North Scottsdale Pediatrics! Even though it’s a rather large practice, every time I go it seems like we are her only patients and she spends so much time with us. She has seen my daughter for the past 2 years and has seen my son since he was born 10 months ago, and I have no doubt that she would recognize us in the grocery store line. We feel so welcome and at home at our office and we would be devastated if we had to change!
I love my ped! East Scottsdale Pediatrics (if you’re in the area). Always knows everything about all of us. I miss her when I don’t see her!
we switched doctors in the same practice a few years back. i didn’t know the new one well and wondered if he knew who we were. then one visit i had all 3 kids in when 2 got a well check. my oldest pitched the biggest fit ever over getting shots. she was in tears. i was in tears. several of the staff ended up holding her down and it was so traumatic. i just wanted to run from that office and never come back. we did go back. and that doctor remembered every part of that visit from months before, including that i was stressed because I had to be at church that afternoon and was running late, which i never directly told him. we talked through the entire event and i felt good staying with him.
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